Doing the right thing and being grouchy about it.

Sometimes you make good choices and you feel good about them.  Other times, those same good choices just piss you off.  That was me today.  I’ve been absent because the family left EARLY on Saturday morning (read up at 3am early) to fly to Virgina to my BIL and SIL’s house.  My niece was been baptized on Sunday morning and I am very grateful not to miss it.  However what followed was 3 long and crazy days which included food options I was not entirely in control of and lots of travel, with two small children.

And I did well.  I have one weekly point remaining and tracked everything I ate.   I had some cake, but also didn’t have some other things that would have inflated my points.  I had some pizza and also some salad.  It was almost a picture perfect way of celebrating with family and managing to stay on plan.

So why am I so grouchy about it?

Is it because I am tired and I really really want to find an excuse to eat anything I want?

Is it because I still feel there is such a long way to go and am a little shell shocked by the full body image in the hotel mirror?

Is it because sometimes we just aren’t in the mood?

Is it because E2 had a rough night and I am very very tired?  (a strong contender)

Is it because I resent that I can’t just eat whatever sounds good at family events like everyone else seems to?

All of the above?

I suppose it is a good lesson.  Sometimes the good choice is not the choice you want to make.  It might make you feel like you were virtuous but you still feel a bit left out.   Sometimes the voices and habits we are breaking “yell” more loudly at us.  Sometimes mood, convenience, and desire make good choices seem unappealing.  Amazingly, you can still make the good choices.

I feel grouchy about it today, but chances are after a good night sleep I will be happy that I stuck to the plan.  Right now however, it is a good thing we need to go to the store badly so there is no food in the house.

Today I walked past a Five Guys, a Cheese-steak place, Chick Fil-A, and countless other options to go get a hummus wrap for myself and a smoothie for E1.  I then calculated the WW points based on the posted nutrition information and walked with my wrap back to the gate past all the same places.  The wrap was delicious, but it wasn’t Five Guys.  But even if I am grouchy about it, I still made the good choice.  (It goes without saying that on WW I could have had Five Guys, but I would need to track it and it would have put me over on my weeklies)

It still counts.  Even when I am reluctant it still counts.

But I better get some sleep so I am not so grouchy about it tomorrow.

Weigh In Week 26

This last week was not an easy week food wise, but I am proud of it.  I am proud because I fought the fight the whole week.  I tracked everything.  I worked hard to get steps in and was over 10,000 for 5 of the 7 days.  I managed to navigate camp food and while I used essentially all my weekly points, I did not touch my activity points and I did not end up in the red for points.  I worked hard at it and when I was hungry and sought out better options whenever I could.

And wouldn’t you know it, hard work pays off.  ( [insert sarcasm font here] You mean when you follow the plan it works?  Shocking. )

-6.8 Pounds

69.2 lbs Lost to Date

BOOM

And I could tell.  For the first time in a few weeks my clothes felt better, I felt smaller again, I had more energy.  It as if my hard work was enough to blast through my plateau.  And while the numbers above make me super happy there is one number that isn’t apparent that makes me even happier.  I count my weight loss primarily from when I started back on Weight Watchers in January after coming back from maternity leave.  Thus my starting weight is the number on the scale in Jan (347).  However, there is another starting weight in my head as well – the weight I was the day of my C-section.  They had me step on the scale at the hospital that morning and it read 382.  Now I am at 278.4, which if you can do math means I have dropped 103.6 lbs in 8.5 months! 

Insane, but it is real.  And for at least 69 lbs of that it has been me working hard at it that led to the loss.  No doubt some of the weight would have come off on its own – pregnancy and I don’t agree -  but this is more than nursing now.  You don’t lose 100+ pounds simply by breastfeeding so I am going to pat myself on the back because I earned this.

Now I am still in the 270s, so there is a lot of progress still to be made, but for today I am celebrating 100 lbs down.  And it feels great.

Visible Progress

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 November 7, 2013 – 39 weeks pregnant and headed to my C-section1453506_10201756164239329_1556490664_n

July 14, 2014 – Trying on clothes just to see.  Fitting into 18/20′s as opposed to the 28s after delivery.

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Progress.

Non Scale Victories from Camp

I am back from camp – a bit tanner, a bit more tired and with a whole lot of bug bites (seriously it is ridiculous).  Camp food was a challenge but on the whole I would say that I navigated it pretty well.  We’ll see for sure what the scale says on Wednesday.  However I do want to point out some Non-Scale Victories I experienced this week.  Some are camp related victories and others are victories of my weight loss that I discovered being at camp.  So here we go.

*  I could walk up the big hills at camp without getting winded.  I could even keep up with other leaders and kids and still carry on a conversation.

*  I could use a sleeping bag in the manner in which it was intended (zipped with me inside) rather than as a comforter.

* I could say no to mediocre desserts

* I did not eat any treats from the canteen – I did buy some for my campers but ate nothing myself.

* I got my 10,000 steps in 4 of my 7 days, and was close on the rest.

* My shorts were too big in the waist (my hips is another story).

* I did not suffer from much back pain sleeping on camp bunks.

* The food tasted processed to me and not all that good.

* I drove into town twice for zero point fruits to eat instead of getting treats or snacks.

* I turned down a S’more and had cherries instead.

* I played games (9 square, gaga, capture the flag) with the kids and while I was not fast I was at least more able to keep up.

* I did my best to fill up on veggies.

* I skipped a few really “dangerous” meals and grabbed something healthier in town instead.

* I kept drinking water all week long.

* I tracked EVERYTHING I ate.

So no matter what the scale says I feel like a did well this week.  I certainly didn’t give myself permission to slack or not track.  I had one meal (at the camp directors house – aka a homemade meal) that I went a bit overboard on, but I tracked it and applied my weekly points to it.  All in all, it was a win.

But I am glad to be home.