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PriorFatGirl is a community of writers who share their healthiness journey with you, our friends. Currently, posts on the main page are written by Liz who is fighting through her healthiness journey (and winning!) You can read other priorfatgirl journeys by clicking on the “Other priorfatgirl’s” drop down from the top menu.

Through the ups and downs of life, the scale, and emotions, we share our stories as a form of therapy for us, and as a way to help remove stigmas associated with trying to live up to social expectations of being perfect. We will not ever promise to be perfect, but we will promise to share candidly our journeys of learning how to be healthy in an unhealthy world, sugar coating not included.

 

Week 4, Weigh-in 2

Week 4,  Weigh in 2:

199 lbs

- 4 lbs total


The last two weeks have been a challenge. The sharp focus I had on my prize in early January began to blur, and my willpower was tested frequently by chocolate, carbohydrates of any kind, and ruthless woman named aptly named Ruthie who drags a red wagon full of Girl Scout Cookies through my office 12 times a day. Doubt, the anti-companion of any attempt I’ve ever made at weight loss waged its first attack in an all-too familiar internal battle: The part of me that thinks this is too hard and too overwhelming vs. the part of me that wants to believe it IS possible for me to reach a goal weight.

Monday night, my restlessness had reached critical mass and I knew that some kind of action was required. I took a long walk and weighed my options. There weren’t many of them.

1) Quit  2) Not Quit

As soon as I gave myself permission to think about it that way, like I had a choice in the matter, I knew exactly what I wanted.

wanted to wear any dress from any store of my choosing to this year’s Christmas parties.

wanted to know that my situation is not hopeless.

wanted change.

I wanted the self-assurance I remember feeling two years ago when I had lost 55 pounds.

A memory of that time cut suddenly into my thoughts and I remembered a day when I’d gone to Charming Charlie’s and found the perfect pair of boots to slide over my size 10 skinny jeans. I don’t even like selfies, but I sure did take one and put it on the blog that day. Then I’d gone to Whole Foods and eaten lunch from the salad bar. It was incredible to feel so at home and so free and so in control of my own body.

I clung to that memory for several blocks, running through it again and again, recounting the treasure of it, and each time different details came back to me and it would become more complete. I remembered that I’d found this joy over not needing unhealthy food. I really liked healthy food I and liked that I had become picky about what I put into my body. I enjoyed making sure vegetables were part of at least two meals a day. The discovery of what a healthy body feels like had been nearly intoxicating and vastly more enjoyable than any high I’d ever gotten from processed sugar. At that very specific point in my journey, I didn’t know what it meant to feel angst over food choices. That battle had been won and the temptation of overeating had lost.

The sliver of hopefulness that came out of my reminiscing was just enough, and in a moment of clarity I knew I needed to fast on Tuesday. It would be a chance to detach from the intensity of losing weight and get a change of perspective. So I did. It was frustrating at moments. At others, it was awesome. When I fell into bed that night having proved to myself that I am not a slave to food, it was well worth it.

So I’m not quitting.

Elle

Weigh In Week 54

Another week, another weigh in.  Does the monotony of these posts drive you nuts or do you look forward to seeing what I’ve done with my week?  For the most part I love my weigh in days – not because I always do well but it is always a reset button – new points, a new chance at a good week.

The walked the fine line this week of too much food.  I ate all my weekly points in one fabulous night out with the family, but then I used a few activity points and just in general pushed it with my portions.  My estimating was sloppy.  And last night I finally went over on points after having a crabby day and simply not caring enough to be strict on my portions.

As a result:

+.4 Pounds

94.0 lbs lost on WW to date

All gains are annoying but in the scheme of things this is salt and a bad night on Tuesday more than a failed week. Today was a better day and I was able to make good decisions all day long.  Sometimes the greatest gift I can give myself is the ability to shrug off a ho hum week and start again.

It is hard to remember on hard days but there really is always a new chance to start over.  A bad decision yesterday doesn’t mean I need to make one today.

So despite a slight gain I am doing fine.  I am awash in non-scale victories – TWO pairs of size 18 pants fit me now, I am getting good comments from people I know, I am staying on top of things at work and feeling confident, my light is helping, my kids are currently well.  Oh, and the most exciting of all – I get to lead a small group discussion at Fitbloggin’ this year!  Woohoo!

Sometimes our progress is not about the scale after all.

Review: Jump Sport iBounce Kid’s Trampoline

A week or two ago I was contacted by JumpSport who was looking for bloggers with children 2-5 to review a kid’s trampoline: the iBounce Kid’s Trampoline  I remembered JumpSport from my first FitBloggin (2013), but had been bummed that I was too pregnant to feel comfortable jumping in their exercise class.

I was excited to review and indoor toy that could keep E1 moving during the winter.  It was also an exciting opportunity because E1 has loved “Toy review videos” on Youtube lately and he was over the moon with a chance to star in his own review video.   Plus, since it has a giveaway to it too it was extra fun.

So we assembled it this weekend and he has been bouncing all weekend long.  It came with 3 DVDs that have bouncing ideas and games, but he prefers to just free bounce.  Even E2 wanted to get in on the action though her gross motor skills require lots of supervision still.

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I really like the trampoline, the bungees are covered so that kids won’t get caught in them.  It isn’t too high off the ground but it still has a good bounce to it.  E1 can get some serious air.

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The handlebars are sturdy and make it safer for the kids.  I do think E1 might be on the cusp of being TOO big for it, it is designed for 2-5 yr olds.  Still I can see E1 and E2 getting a lot of use out of this.  And if E1 is bouncing during the occasional netflix video even better.  There is even an iPad holder you can attack and an app to give additional bouncing games for the kids.
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I could go on, but I think the smiles on E1’s face and his enthusiasm speak volumes.  (Please note, he is sometimes tempted to show off and forgot the handlebars at one point.  We are working on that, lol.)

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