Moving on.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! I finally made it to the gym last night – it felt so good to just zone out and sweat a little. I wish I could get back into morning workouts but Francisco is still all over the place with waking up in the morning. Sometimes he is up at 3:30am, sometimes he sleeps until 4:50am. Carlos is really helpful with Francisco but I’m much more of a morning person than he is so for now, morning workouts aren’t really going to work. Until then, I just have to keep pushing myself to get the evening workouts in. I am not trying to set expectations for myself too high – I would like to be consistent with just 3 to 4 times a week.

This morning, we were up at about 5am. I had plenty of time to mix up some chicken salad and put together lunches for today and tomorrow for myself.

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Tonight I have a hair appt at 5pm so I’m going to run there after work, then my plan is to go home, change into workout clothes and hit the gym again. I also need to spend some time googling baby things:

  • How to get Francisco to sleep through the night.
    The doctor told us at his last appointment we should try to stop with the night time feedings. Francisco wakes up 1-3 times a night. The first time or two that he wakes up, I can get him back to sleep without eating but sometime between 2am and 4am, I will usually need to feed him to get him back to sleep. I talked with my sisters and they all said they never forced the night time feedings to stop, they just did it until the babies slept through the night on their own. I did some initial research and there is a lot of information on both sides so I guess I just need to figure out where we will land.
  • How to get Francisco to not bite.
    Yesterday when I picked him up from daycare, one of the teachers said the past couple days he has been crawling up to them and biting their knees. Francisco has his two bottom teeth and is eating more and more table food so I know a lot of babies go through this stage.
  • Baby sign language.
    I feel like I’m starting a little later on this but do want to start using baby sign language at home.

Any advice on sleeping, biting or baby sign language?

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Let me try this again.

Another day where I’ve waken up feeling ready to tackle the world. So, let’s try this again. I set my workout clothes on the bed so they are there looking at me when I get home.

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aaww… Mr. Iggy. My first lil’ baby! He is adjusting fairly well to Francisco. 7 months now, I cannot believe it. Iggy didn’t look at Carlos or me the first few weeks, he was so mad at us for bringing home a crying baby. But every day they seem to get along more and more. Iggy is very careful around Francisco. Francisco has so far been fairly careful with Iggy. I try to be very consistent in trying to teach Francisco to pet Iggy nicely, saying “nice doggy.” Iggy LOVES to play tug ‘o war and I’ve seen Francisco being very attentive when I play with Iggy the past month. In fact, in the past week or so, I’ve noticed Francisco will pick up one of Iggy’s toys and try to hold it up to Iggy. Iggy doesn’t really know how to respond. I’m not sure I want Francisco playing tug ‘o war with Iggy right now, I feel like Iggy and Francisco may not understand boundaries just yet and one of them will get too rough with the other. Either way, we keep a pretty close eye on both of them when they get near each other. I’m glad though that Iggy seems to be adjusting well to Francisco – I was a little nervous at first because I certainly did baby my little Iggster.

Alright friends, it’s Tuesday and we got work to do. Here’s to a day full of healthy decisions!

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Work or working out.

For the first time in three weeks, I woke up this morning feeling like I was human. I felt healthy, ready to take on the day and make healthy decisions, and be productive. Bronchitis is no joke, it knocked me down for the better part of three weeks. I still have a lingering cough but my doctor said that would probably linger for another week or so. Either way, it is nowhere close to being as bad as it was.

Before heading out the door this morning, I packed lunches for Francisco and myself, put dinner in the crock pot and then went back to the bedroom to set aside workout clothes for tonight. I told Carlos that I absolutely NEEDED to go to the gym tonight after Francisco went to bed. I set clothes out so that it was just that much easier for me to feel prepared.

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We were all out of the house by 7am. Carlos drops Francisco off at daycare in the mornings so I am usually  at work by about 7:25am. Work today included 7 meetings, extending a couple offers, eating lunch at my desk while I listened to voicemails, and sending a crazy number of emails. At 4:15pm, I scrambled to leave work and rushed to pick Francisco up from daycare. Once we got home at about 4:45pm, I alternated between playing with Francisco, making dinner and catching up with Carlos on how our days went. We ate dinner and Francisco went to bed at 6pm (I know, early — a discussion for another post.) At 6:15pm, I grabbed my work laptop and turned it on.

And now, I realize it is TWO HOURS later and I haven’t moved from the couch. Another two hours of work, it’s now 8:15pm and I haven’t worked out. I worked instead of working out. Working and being a full-time parent is crazy.

Today is not a complete failure though – I still made consciously healthy decisions.

But tomorrow, tomorrow I need to work out.

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Is struggling with healthiness a privilege?

It’s ironic now that I decided that I need to blog again, I find myself with nothing to say. Every time I think about writing a blog post, it just sounds so repetitive with what I’ve written years and years ago.

I’m holding steady at 210 right now, so a total of 6lbs lost in 6 weeks. Laughable, honestly. 6 pounds is 6 pounds but to be honest, I know I can do better. I’m still letting a lot of excuses win. Francisco got his first ear infection last Monday on top of a pretty crazy cold he had been fighting. Poor little guy, I just wanted to smother him in snuggles. He got on antibiotics which kicked in pretty quickly so all was well except in less than 24 hour, I caught the cold he had. A cold that knocked me out. Wednesday I got home from work and went right to bed. Thursday I could barely talk and by the time Friday came, I couldn’t even get out of bed. I slept the whole day. My voice started to come back on Saturday but barely. It’s now Tuesday and I’ve had this cold for a week. I am still barely surviving. Scratchy voice, sneezing, coughing and just getting by.

A time when my body needs the healthiest foods possible to fight off this cold and I’m struggling. An excuse, I tell myself. All excuses. I am not being hard on myself, I am just being honest with myself. I know that in order to be healthy, I have to stop allowing all these normal life happenings to get in my way. I have a child now. I am pretty sure I will be tired for the next 18 years. I will need to figure it out. And I have a job. One that is fairly intense and requires me to work 50 hours a week. I am not a unique snowflake with struggles that others don’t have. Other people… other women figure this out.

So what do I blog about?

I certainly do not have the capacity to write multiple times a week about what I do every day. Nor do I want to anymore. I have no interest in chronicling my life day-by-day because frankly, wouldn’t that be boring? My life is not exciting, lol.

When I originally mentioned I needed to be back, my thought was that I needed to blog through the struggles. But given all that is going on in the world, it seems so…. juvenile. So privileged of me that being healthy is a struggle. Other people in this world have struggles so much bigger than what I’m going through and yet here I sit in my tiny corner of Milwaukee struggling because even though I have access to an abundance of amazing healthy foods, I don’t want to eat it.

Okay – I think I’m going down a rabbit hole here and I’m not sure where it will stop if I don’t just stop myself 🙂

6 pounds. A victory, albeit a small victory.

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