The Joy of Normal

I don’t know about you but one of the things I dreaded most about being fat is going to the doctor.  There are the labs and the admonishments to lose weight.  There is the fear of what the number on the scale will be, or in my case, the blood pressure number was enough to, well, raise my blood pressure.  As a result there is a fear and an unease when it comes to going to the doctor, even for those routine checkups.  The fear stays with you a long time.  I still have anxiety about getting my blood pressure taken, even if it is at automated kiosk at Target (which amazingly enough I can fit my arm into now).

Today I had a followup doctor’s appointment from my initial weight management assessment from December.  I like that they have doctors as a part of the program to address any of the physical issues.  Anyway, one of the things I had to do was get blood-work done for labs.  Lots of labs – Cholesterol, Glucose, Vitamins, Iron, etc…

I got the results of all but one at the doctor’s appointment today.  I won’t lie, I was anxious going into it.  What if I am having sugar issues (a common fear of diabetes when large), what if I am getting my family’s history of high cholesterol, ack!

Instead the results were….normal.

Everything, but one remaining test that hadn’t come through, was normal.  Within range.  Acceptable limits.  Even, dare I say, good?  My vitamin D was normal, but a tad lower than they prefer, but otherwise everything was great.  My first thought was one of relief, that I had dodged a medical bullet.  But my second thought was pride.  I didn’t dodge a bullet, I worked to lose 70+ lbs.  Those numbers are normal because I am putting in the work.  I am still fat.  I am obese, but I am better than I was.

There is a joy in being normal.  There is joy in not being the largest one in the room.  There is joy in not having doctor’s frown at your numbers.  There is joy in not having to dread a doctor visit.  There is joy in doing the work to get there.

I have been stressed because the task of losing weight is getting harder for me, but I realized that all things get harder.  You have to learn basic math before you get to calculus.  I am graduating to advanced weight loss now.  It will, and should take more work, and there is joy in that too.  Because today, I am closer to normal than I have been in a long long time.

The number on the scale may not be where it needs to be, but there are other numbers that matter too.  Today I feel normal, and it is a wonderful feeling.

 

Comments

  1. I love the math reference! Thank You Nerddom!

    My Vitamin D was low too last it was checked. I think it’s tough for us Minnesotan’s to get enough of that. (as it comes from sunlight)

  2. Congratulations! You have worked hard for that. You can only dodge that bullet if you make yourself a smaller target and work on your flexibility to get out of the way!

    I am vitamin D deficient, and I live in Australia! But because there is so much sun, I stay indoors all the time. Too much of a good thing.

  3. That’s awesome! Glad you are enjoying this feeling today! Keep on fighting the good fight! :)

  4. I loved this post! I too have lost weight – 33 lbs and it does feel so good to be normal again. My last doctor’s check up he said that I was textbook perfect with all my numbers (except my weight at that time – that was before I lost weight). Congratulations on your progress!!

  5. Wow Liz – you perfectly expressed my feelings associated with going to the doctor. Kudos to you for 1) – the great numbers!! Not an easy accomplishment and OH… what a meaningful one! But also, kudos to you for 2) – still viewing your health as a priority and going to the doctor despite the discomfort. You are SUCH and inspiration. Have a good weekend :)

  6. Amazing!

  7. Normal is good! I am glad you are normal!

  8. I understand the fear of going to doctors. I absolutely hate it especially the weigh in and nurses need to shout it on top of their lungs.

  9. I also love the math reference! Congrats on everything coming back normal!

  10. Wonderful!! Love how you said you’re graduating to advanced weight loss…perfectly said, because that’s where I’m at too. And, yes, it’s getting harder. :)

  11. I love this positive post from you Liz!! And I love that you called it “advanced weight loss”. What an excellent reference.

  12. I love love love this post! You hit the head on the nail about the anxiety of a doctor visit for someone who is obese. I hated it and used to have to think happy thoughts when the nurse was taking my BP. Sometimes it worked and the number was low, sometimes the walk from the waiting room was enough to get it up and even happy thoughts weren’t going to help it. It is truly an amazing feeling when you go and do not get the lecture about trying to lose weight or get some number under control. Congratulations on getting good news and seeing the benefits of all the work that you have done.

  13. How rewarding to see all those hours in the gym paying off, in more ways than one. Congrats!

  14. Congratulations on the lab results– I completely understand the fear and anxiety (and then resulting relief!) when waiting for results. I had my first set of excellent lab results in December after losing 45lbs. I still have a ways to go before I’m at my goal, but I celebrated that victory (and may or may not have hung the results on my refrigerator haha)

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