YAY!! I made it to the gym yesterday at work! I did 20 minutes on the elliptical and 30 minutes of a kickboxing class and boy was I sweaty. It felt GREAT! I plan on going again today during my lunch and doing 45min of the elliptical.
Who Cares?
My entire life, I have always cared about what I look like, what I sound like, what others thought of me, what kind of impression I was giving off, how people perceived my words, if people liked me and on and on.
This is especially obvious in how I dress – I have not been able to wear a tank top, a dress, anything that showed more skin the needed. By all means, I was fat, what would people think!
Flash forward to Mexico:
Yep!!! You are seeing that right!
A BIKINI
I never in my entire life thought I would be able to wear a bikini! HOLY CRAP! I was scared out of my freakin’ mind! What would people think? What would they say? Gawd, I thought I would be so embarrassed!
Breaking A Complex
It will be a big deal if we make it a big deal. (some things should be a big deal, like death, births, & major life events). We have the power to react to any situation however we want to – our feelings are different then our reaction.
We can feel scared…nervous, terrified. Which I did. I was scared, nervous and TERRIFIED to show so much skin! I was scared someone was going to point and laugh. I was scared I would be made fun of and run to the bathroom with tears rolling down my cheeks like some dramatic moment from a high school movie. But my reaction was to do it anyways. Who cares if I wore a swimsuit?! Who cares if I showed my belly which looks like a jiggly water bed (skin). Those ladies 
who are close to 200lbs and wearing bikini’s certainly DID NOT care about what I was wearing. The bride & groom had their own issues to deal with and certainly paid no attention to what I was wearing. No one else cared except for me!
who are close to 200lbs and wearing bikini’s certainly DID NOT care about what I was wearing. The bride & groom had their own issues to deal with and certainly paid no attention to what I was wearing. No one else cared except for me!
So I was thinking on the airplane home how in the world I got myself to actually wear it, how did I find the courage to do it? Well, the minute I felt scared & nervous I knew it was that exact thing I had to do! I looked my fear in the face and did it anyways. (With the encouragement from Carlos & Amanda, another priorfatgirl – thanks guys!)
And guess what? I didn’t die! Nope, I’m alive. And better yet, I have pictures of me, in my swimsuit, looking like I’m having fun – because I am having fun!
That is the exact way we can push beyond what is holding us back. When you get scared, stop & reflect and say “WHO CARES?” Because chances are, you are the only one! Do it anyways – what’s the worst that can happen?
Note: Not to diminish the fact that I am excited I wore that swimsuit, but I chose this picture for a reason – because it doesn’t show my tummy. One of these days, I will do an update on my jiggly tummy 
Stop back tomorrow for a tale of oreo preportion!
