Archives for July 2008

"Darn Good" Excuses For Not Exercising Quiz

Take the “Darn Good” Excuses For Not Exercising Quiz below. Feel free to leave a comment with your score.

1. I absolutely cannot exercise because:

  • I have an I.Q. of 175, and it wouldn’t be fair to have brains and beauty
  • I don’t want to look like Gwen Stafani or Jessica Biel
  • I don’t want to encourage the Hollywood stereotype that young girls have to live up to
  • I want to look like a “real” man

2. I don’t have to exercise because:

  • I’m already thin and if I exercise there won’t be anything left of me
  • I have superior metabolism
  • I barely consume enough calories in a day
  • I already have lots of energy

3. My idea of “Warming Up” before a workout is to:

  • Go lie under an electric blanket for 15 minutes
  • Go sit in front of a fireplace with a good book for 15 minutes
  • Go down to the local bar and order a “Boilermaker” and nurse it for 15 minutes
  • Go into the kitchen and make a cup of hot chocolate topped off with marshmallows and 15 different kinds of cookies

4. My favorite weight-loss reality tv show is:

  • The Biggest Loser
  • Celebrity Fit Club
  • Survivor
  • The Simple Life starring Paris Hilton & Nicole Ritchie

5. I exercise everyday by:

  • Walking 12 feet to my mailbox to retrieve the mail
  • Skipping 3 blocks down to the local Dunkin’ Donuts
  • Jumping up use the bathroom or grab something to drink during the commercial breaks
  • Twirling round and round in my swivel chair for 30 seconds at work

6. Healthy foods:

  • like carrots make me fart
  • taste like cardboard
  • Aren’t for those who have tastebuds
  • Taste bland and aren’t

7. The best fashion/exercise moment in history is:

  • Richard Simmons sweatin’ to the oldies in Daisy-Duke short-shorts
  • Jennifer Beals dancing like she’s never danced before in a torn sweatshirt in the movie, Flashdance
  • Anna Nicole Smith prancing around in spandex shorts three sizes too small on her reality TV show, The Anna Nicole Show
  • Olivia Newton-John sauntering around in the “Physical” video wearing a headband, leotard & leg warmers

8. I can’t afford to exercise because:

  • the Air Jordan tennis shoes I need cost $150
  • I have to pay for my kid’s college education in 18 years, so I have to start saving up NOW
  • I already went out to eat 3 times this week
  • Let’s face it, workout clothes aren’t attractive

Scoring: For each answer selected subtract 5 points. Negative points means a negative attitude.

TRUE OR FALSE QUESTIONS:

9. All of the above answers are not only incredibly ridiculous but they are the worst excuses in the world for not exercising and eating properly?

  • True
  • False

10. Excuses will help you lose weight and support your family, mentally and financially, when you drop dead from coronary heart disease?

  • True
  • False

"Darn Good" Excuses For Not Exercising Quiz

Take the “Darn Good” Excuses For Not Exercising Quiz below. Feel free to leave a comment with your score.

1. I absolutely cannot exercise because:

  • I have an I.Q. of 175, and it wouldn’t be fair to have brains and beauty
  • I don’t want to look like Gwen Stafani or Jessica Biel
  • I don’t want to encourage the Hollywood stereotype that young girls have to live up to
  • I want to look like a “real” man

2. I don’t have to exercise because:

  • I’m already thin and if I exercise there won’t be anything left of me
  • I have superior metabolism
  • I barely consume enough calories in a day
  • I already have lots of energy

3. My idea of “Warming Up” before a workout is to:

  • Go lie under an electric blanket for 15 minutes
  • Go sit in front of a fireplace with a good book for 15 minutes
  • Go down to the local bar and order a “Boilermaker” and nurse it for 15 minutes
  • Go into the kitchen and make a cup of hot chocolate topped off with marshmallows and 15 different kinds of cookies

4. My favorite weight-loss reality tv show is:

  • The Biggest Loser
  • Celebrity Fit Club
  • Survivor
  • The Simple Life starring Paris Hilton & Nicole Ritchie

5. I exercise everyday by:

  • Walking 12 feet to my mailbox to retrieve the mail
  • Skipping 3 blocks down to the local Dunkin’ Donuts
  • Jumping up use the bathroom or grab something to drink during the commercial breaks
  • Twirling round and round in my swivel chair for 30 seconds at work

6. Healthy foods:

  • like carrots make me fart
  • taste like cardboard
  • Aren’t for those who have tastebuds
  • Taste bland and aren’t

7. The best fashion/exercise moment in history is:

  • Richard Simmons sweatin’ to the oldies in Daisy-Duke short-shorts
  • Jennifer Beals dancing like she’s never danced before in a torn sweatshirt in the movie, Flashdance
  • Anna Nicole Smith prancing around in spandex shorts three sizes too small on her reality TV show, The Anna Nicole Show
  • Olivia Newton-John sauntering around in the “Physical” video wearing a headband, leotard & leg warmers

8. I can’t afford to exercise because:

  • the Air Jordan tennis shoes I need cost $150
  • I have to pay for my kid’s college education in 18 years, so I have to start saving up NOW
  • I already went out to eat 3 times this week
  • Let’s face it, workout clothes aren’t attractive

Scoring: For each answer selected subtract 5 points. Negative points means a negative attitude.

TRUE OR FALSE QUESTIONS:

9. All of the above answers are not only incredibly ridiculous but they are the worst excuses in the world for not exercising and eating properly?

  • True
  • False

10. Excuses will help you lose weight and support your family, mentally and financially, when you drop dead from coronary heart disease?

  • True
  • False

A Letter To My Fat

**I found this letter a couple of days ago – happy calorie counting!
______________________________________________________________
Dear Fat,

This is to inform you that your lease is coming to an end and that it is time for you to vacate the premises. We’ve had a long-term arrangement, you and I, even friendly at times, but all good things must come to an end, and it is now time for this working relationship to end.

You have brought neighborhood property values down, and have polluted the neighborhood for the last time! You are no longer wanted here and must leave.

Please pack up your bags and prepare to be evicted.

Sincerely Yours,

Management
______________________________________________________________

A Letter To My Fat

**I found this letter a couple of days ago – happy calorie counting!
______________________________________________________________
Dear Fat,

This is to inform you that your lease is coming to an end and that it is time for you to vacate the premises. We’ve had a long-term arrangement, you and I, even friendly at times, but all good things must come to an end, and it is now time for this working relationship to end.

You have brought neighborhood property values down, and have polluted the neighborhood for the last time! You are no longer wanted here and must leave.

Please pack up your bags and prepare to be evicted.

Sincerely Yours,

Management
______________________________________________________________

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