Last night, I came home to this squish-able, lovable face:

ooohhh, little baby Blanco!

Blanco is staying with us for a day or two while his mommy and daddy move. Blanco is 9 weeks old and already weighs twice as Iggy. Iggy and Blanco were a little hesitant of each other at first but by the end of the night were rolling around like two brothers.

Didjaknow tomorrow is my birthday? September 4th — it happens every year! I love presents. If you want to give me a birthday present, please make a donation to your favorite charity in my honor – think of me and DONATEGIVE! To celebrate my birthday, I’m doing something I’ve never done before…

GIRLS WEEKEND!

Yep, that’s right – I’ve never gone away without Carlos or family for a weekend. Who am I going with? Glad you asked — I’m going with Cindy!

Me, Cindy and Mary (ah, Mary -- I wish you were coming with)

Cindy and I are going far far away to a hotel about an hour and a half away — the hotel has a water park so I’m packing my swimsuit. Lazy river, here I come! You can bet there will be pedicures, wine and laughter this weekend.

Before Cindy and I go, Carlos wants to to take me out for a pre-birthday lunch. He says he has one birthday surprise for me today and then on Sunday, when I get back, another surprise. To celebrate my actual birthday, we are having a date night on Sunday. I can’t wait – I love dates!

Next long run.

Sunday. 8 miles. Do I really need to say anything other than aaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

Luckily, my running friend Meghan, is going to run with me. Meghan, as I mentioned before, has paced races before and is extremely encouraging while running. While running, Meghan always seems to say the perfect “we totally got this” or “we are doing so well” at the right time. And, typically towards the end, when I’m running out of steam, she reminds me “we can do this for 5 more minutes, we can do anything for 5 minutes!”

It’s that whole positive self-talk thing, I swear!
Glass half full, people!

She’s like my secret running weapon (although I talk about her, so not really a secret.)

And…now I have to go – Blanco and Iggy both woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning so I need to encourage friendly play.

P.S., It is a holiday weekend here in the U.S. so I may or may not update on Monday.

{ 23 comments }

Despite everything you’ve been told, do you ever wear your post-workout look as a badge of honor? Do you ever let yourself be seen after working out because you’re proud of yourself?

This morning, I woke up at 4:50am to meet a friend for a run. It was raining. So we decided not to go running. I put on a DVD and after 8 minutes, realized it had stopped raining. I really wanted to go running so I stopped the DVD and grabbed a headband. About 5 minutes into my run, it started to sprinkle. Soon, the sprinkles turned into rain drops. It wasn’t down-pouring but it wasn’t sprinkling. Determined to run, I wiped my nose off and kept going.  3 miles of running in the rain. And by the time I finished, the rain drops were the heaviest they had been and I was drenched. Despite my initial reaction of jumping into the shower to clean up, I grabbed my camera and took a picture.

I am proud of myself.

A picture to capture a moment in time when I have defied what I could have excused myself out of doing. A picture to capture a moment in time when I pushed myself beyond average. A picture to capture a moment in time when I felt strong. A picture to capture a moment in time when I am proud of myself.

I am proud of myself.
I am proud of myself.
I am proud of myself.

I am not alone — below are my friends who took a picture to capture
a moment in time when they too, were proud of themselves.

Sarah @ Fat Little Legs

(Who hit her goal of losing106lbs just last week, CONGRATULATIONS!!)

Marlena

A picture snapped after her first 5K!

Gabby @ Cupcake Love

Une femme en santé

MizFit @ MizFitOnline

Jodi

Cheryl @ Cheryl’s Blog

Jessica @ Run 4 My Money

Taken during her first inline half-marathon.

Ivonne

Teri

Did you capture a moment in time when you were sweaty yet felt proud? Email it to me at jen@priorfatgirl.com along with our name (as well as blog if you want that linked.) I’ll include your photo in the next update!

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(Server note: Seems like most blogs on Dreamhost were down for a short period this morning. If you can see me now, we are back in business so on with the show!)

I’m one of those people who can’t write unless I know what I’m going to write. I may not know how it will end but I cannot force myself to sit here and write unless I have a concrete idea. I was the same way in grad school – I could have an assignment due but until I formulated a paper in my head, there was no way I could force myself to write.

Yesterday, I mentioned the fact that I woke up early to run but the rain kept me from running. I am getting into my busy season at work which means working out over lunch will be very limited over the next couple of months. That meant I needed to get my run in after work yesterday which isn’t a big deal unless I’m crabby, cranky, and hot. Such was the case last night.

By 6:30, I was stomping my feet. I had decided it was too hot and was already mentally typing up a post explaining all the reasons why I could NOT run. In fact, I had already declared to Carlos I wouldn’t make my run. As I was mentally typing the post, I decided to take Iggy outside to go potty and take a couple of deep breaths.

Source.

Ironically, as I took those deep breaths, I realized that I was making excuses as to why I couldn’t run. It dawned on me that in the end, I was the one who had to stand up and be proud of my choice. If I couldn’t be proud of my choice, then what good was that choice? I knew exactly what I had to do. So, kicking and screaming and throwing my kindergartner tantrum, Iggy and I walked back in side.

Carlos was walking into the kitchen to find sometime for dinner and looked at me. Here is how the conversation went:

Carlos: What’s up?
Me: Nothing. I went outside and took a couple of deep breaths and realized I have to go running.
Carlos: Good. I’m glad your going.
Me: I’m not glad. I don’t want to go.  Are you sure you don’t want me to make you dinner? Come’on! I’ll make you homemade chicken alfredo!
Carlos: ooohhh, that does sound good. NOW GO RUNNING!

I put my shoes on and went.

It was a crappy run and I only made it 3 of the 5 miles I was suppose to run. But I am proud of it. I did not let my attitude or excuses win. I stepped outside of my tantrum throwing childish view and recognized what was really going on.

I made a decision I could be proud of.

And then, I came home and made me a comforting dinner….breakfast!

Breakfast for dinner.

Moving forward:

How many times have you heard me say I need to get back into a morning workout routine? Probably too many times to count. But here is the deal. As I mentioned above, the next 3 months at work are going to be insanely busy (I work in campus recruiting and so fall is a big time of the year for us). That said, I need to start my day off right.

My current training schedule has me working out Sunday, Tuesday, Wednesday,  Thursday & Saturday with Monday & Friday as rest days. Luckily my work schedule today will allow me to get my cardio in over lunch. Tomorrow, it does not. So my goal, starting tomorrow will be to complete my Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday workouts BEFORE work. Tuesdays & Thursdays are runs and Wednesdays are typically cross training days (so I’ll probably do a DVD at home.)

Special Purchase:

By the way……… last night, Carlos and I booked our tickets to Rome! It will be two weeks of beyond words! Carlos’ sister lives in Rome and his niece is getting married so we are going for her wedding. AAAHHH – I cannot wait! I promise to update from Rome and share a ton of pictures!

Do any of you live in Rome?

Final thought:

Last week, I had a worried thought:

What am I going to do after I’m done training for my 10 mile run in October? What is going to keep me on a “schedule?”

I’ve heard people experience this before — they train for a goal for months on end and then, once the event has happened, they are left wondering what is next. I’ve actually figured out the answer but I thought I’d entertain some of  your ideas first, before sharing my plan.

Whaddya got for me?

{ 28 comments }

Sunday was my first 7 mile run followed by a day of rest yesterday. Today, back at it with a 5 mile run. I woke up at 5:15 again to try and run however this time, the dark didn’t stop me—it was the monster of a storm that had just passed. Everything was still dripping and so I just rolled over and went back to sleep. I guess I’ll get my 5 miles in tonight!

2010 PriorFatGirl E-Cookbook?

You helped me put together an e-cookbook last year – so many great recipes that were easy to make! Just like the ladies at church do, but we did it virtually and concentrated on healthy recipes. An entire year has passed and I personally have come up with some new recipes on my own (buffalo chicken anyone?) I can only assume you have come up with some go-to recipes as well.

Would you be interested in doing another one? Do you desire to help make this one bigger &  better? Last years cookbook had 50 recipes but I think if we do another one, we should aim to have 100 in this one. To get there, I’ll need help…no way I can do it on my own.

– Thoughts?
– Idea’s?
– Are you game?

Sun-dried Tomatos

Thank you for all your input on Sunday about tomatos. I did not realize tomatos and fridges don’t go together – the tomatos are now comfy on my counter! I’m contemplating two ideas:

• Sun-dried tomatos: Based on the recipes I’ve read, it takes 4-6 hours to make these — and since I love sun-dried tomatos, why not?! Anyone have any links to their FAVORITE recipes?
• Caramelized Tomato Cobbler: The name made me hesitant but after reading Mama in Wonderland’s recipe & recent blog post, I’m definitely intrigued.

Red and juicy!

P.S., is it “tomatos” or “tomatoes”? I always thought it was “tomatos” however my spell check is telling me it is “tomatoes.” Has my entire life been a lie?

Operation sshhh

A little over a month ago, I mentioned I was laughing Operation: ssshhhh. I was feeling like this whole healthiness lifestyle thing had taken over my life…in an obsessed way. We all know I’ve reached out and have been vocal about seeing a therapist and a dietitian to help work through the emotional side of eating healthy, but I got to a point where I felt like all I ever did was talk about calories, being healthy, working out, where I get my motivation from, healthy eating, healthy foods, aaahhhh — the list goes on!

This blog truly has become my passion but, as I mentioned in the Operation: ssshhhh post, I felt like I never talked about anything else. Here is what I came up with:

Here’s how Operation: ssshhhh will work: From this point forward, I will make my relationship with Carlos my safe zone. I will not talk about my weight, my need to work out, how hungry or full I am, calories, nutrition or anything else healthy related. I need to (want to) remove food/calories, etc from being the focal point of our relationship. I want our relationship to be a safe zone where I can feel like I don’t have to hide how hungry or full I am.

Update: eh, so-so. Why is this so hard? Some days are better than others. Over the past month, Carlos has become pretty consistent with going to the gym which means now it is a conversation he brings up every once in awhile. This presents a challenge. I think it is okay when he brings it up but it leaves me wanting to talk about my own journey, which I have. When he brings up his own journey, I want & should be there for him but I should not and cannot turn the conversation around and allow it to be an excuse to talk about it.  I need to really focus on this and break the need for me to concentrate so much on talking about this.

So…here is me, rededicating my Operation: ssshhhh.

Operation: ssshhhh

Sometimes (or most of the time?) good ideas are a challenge — this whole Operation: ssshhh definetly is a challenge. Do you ever create a safe zone for yourself? A safe zone from what?

Tuesday Tuesday… I better get going and see what is in store for me today! The sooner we get through Tuesday, the sooner Wednesday will be here!

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Whew – what a weekend! Friday night, we went to hang out with my moms family for a pre-reunion get together. It was at a huge park where the kids could run around and act like…kids! Carlos and I left early because he had a poker game. For a late dinner, I had Subway and made googly eyes at Iggy– ah, he is so adorable!

Saturday

Saturday…my goal was to wake up at 5:30am and go for my first ever 7 mile run. When my alarm went off at 5:30am I looked outside and it was pitch black! I didn’t even think about the fact that the days are getting shorter and the sun isn’t coming up as early as it has been. I wasn’t too excited about going running by myself in the pitch black so I laid down for 30 minutes. At 6am I got up and looked outside — still dark. I contemplated going running but fear got the best of me so I decided not to run. By the time the sun started to come out, I wouldn’t have had enough time to get my run in so I showered and just got ready for the day. Carlos and I volunteered at Feed My Starving Children from 9am-11am. Such a great organization!

After volunteering we ran home to grab Iggy and our potluck food items and headed out again. We got to the park and was surrounded by all my moms family. Cousins, aunts, uncles, sisters, everything. HOW FUN! We all ate and then, my cuz Kirsten got us all ready for some games!

Among the games was one game where you had to, without your hands, cover your nose in Vaseline and stick a cotton ball to it. Then, you run to the other side and again, without hands, put the cotton ball on the plate.

Getting in on the action.

Carlos, is that a cotton ball or are you blowing your nose?

Another game was a relay. On the third station of the relay, we had to fill a 20 oz cup full of water using a 3 oz cup – you had to go back and forth between two tables as fast as you could.

Fillin' up their cups.

The faster you went, the more water seemed to spill out of the 3 oz cup. At one point, it was so slippery, Carlos slid into the table and spilled the everyone’s water. HILARIOUS!

Action shot!

I ended up eating my way through the day and am pretty sure I ate a dozen cookies all by myself. We didn’t leave the park until 7:30pm — we were both tired but Carlos and I ended up going over to my cuz, Kirsten’s house for an hour. We didn’t get home until 9:15pm which meant there was no way I got my 7 mile run in.

Sunday = Run Day

Since I ended up not getting my run in on Saturday, I was determined to wake up and run on Sunday (which meant no bootcamp for me, sorry Mary!) I woke up and had some pre-run fuel:

Some bread & 1/2 Justin's Nut Butter.

I ate and then waited about 20 minutes to make sure I had a chance to at least start digesting the PB. I had some water, went to the bathroom one more time, and then headed out for my run!

Many people I’ve talked with have advised me that after 50 minutes of consistent running, I should have some calories. Calories (including CARBS for immediate energy.) For my run, I brought some Power Bar Energy Gel Blasts that I found at the grocery store a couple days ago.

Running fuel.

After 60 minutes, I ate a little more than 1/2 the packet.

These were so yummy! They tasted exactly like fruit chews but were a little sweeter – and I’m all about sweet! Although I walked for a total of about 2 minutes, I was so excited to finish the entire thing! It was all about mind over matter. There were a couple times when I wanted to walk more but I just kept pushing myself. For me, it isn’t about time — just that I finish.

AND I FINISHED!

Post-run = all smiles!

I ate the rest of the fruit gels when I got home and sat on the couch staring off into space…in awe for about 5 minutes. Carlos finally told me to get in the shower while he made breakfast. Bacon & eggs. YUM!

7 miles in 1 hour, 25 minutes.

EEEKKKK – I cannot believe I ran for that long! Amazing, simply amazing!

The rest of my Sunday was pretty laid back – laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning and 2 episodes of Hells Kitchen on Hulu. As busy as a weekend can get for us around here, I am all about the no plans on Sunday to catch up and have at least one day of just whatever happens!

I thought I would be hungrier than I was but maybe it was all the cookies I had on Saturday? Or, maybe I’ll be super hungry Monday? We’ll see!

How was your weekend?

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When we bought our house, a small garden came with. In the past four months, I have learned that I am not a gardener and have no green thumb at all.

Despite my inability to grow anything besides weeds, three things emerged. Broccoli, strawberries (just the green…didn’t get much fruit) and tomatos.

Red and juicy!

I feel like I’m in heaven. I have a bowl full of beautiful little tomatos (grape or cherry) in my fridge and expect another bowl within the week. I’ve already been eating them for two weeks – you know, just poppin’ them in my mouth to taste the amazing flavor bursting from ‘em!

But….I’ve decided I want to do something with them. I like eating them plain but need idea’s. What can I make with them?

Ideas? Keep it simple, I’m not a professional here.

{ 31 comments }

Here we are, the start to yet another busy weekend. However, Carlos and I kicked things off last night with a little relaxation. I came home and went for a short run (more on that in a second). When I got back from my run, an oh-la-la hot man had made dinner. Steak and potatos. I bellied up to to the table and inhaled my plate in minutes. No lie. Carlos laughed at me – normally he finishes first.

After dinner, we decided to get serious. Scrabble serious.

Is the start of a scrabble game any indication on how hard the rest of the game will be?

Yes friends, seems like lately, we are all about the games. This game last night lasted 2 hours (I reeaaaallllyyy take my time, which I think gets annoying.)  The game ended at 9:30pm and I swear, I must be getting old, because all my heart desired was to be cozied up under the covers. So I did. A full 8 hours of sleep = happy me!

Running Update

Ya’ll know I’m training for my very first 10 mile run on October 3rd. I cannot believe how far I’ve come in my schedule and am amazed by what a body can do if you are just patient with it (see yesterday’s post).  Here is what my schedule looks like, as of this morning:

Haven't missed/skipped a day yet!

aaahhh look at all them pretty red lines! I really am proud of my accomplishments – no way did I ever think I would make it this far. Although there were some days when I switched things around, I’ve worked out 5 days a week since I started the training schedule.

I had my first “off” or “bad” run last night. I was suppose to go out for a short, 3 mile run and didn’t want to go. I was hungry and tired and just wanted to skip the run.  I grabbed a couple pieces of deli meat and went anyway. About 1.5 miles into the run, the positive self-talk kicked in but in a fake kind of way. I was pushing myself but it was really hard. At about 2 miles, I gave out and just couldn’t do it anymore. I don’t know if it was because I was hungry or because I had to go to the bathroom (TMI?) or because I mentally just ran outta oommpphh but I stopped. That was the first time I’ve ever not made my run. I’m not beating myself up over it, I know those runs happen and am going to appreciate today more than ever.

Today is a rest day – but tomorrow, I’m scared of.

eeeeekkkk - can someone do this one for me?

Tomorrow, I have to run 7 miles. I’m scared. I need to take a couple of deep breaths and prepare for it mentally. Plan out my route so I know where I’m going. Apparently, it is recommended that after 50 minutes of consistent running, you consume calories. So for my run tomorrow, I will need to find something to consume.

My ankle has been doing okay – I never ended up going to see the doctor because, although it still hurts a little after running, as long as I ice it right after my runs, the pain goes away pretty quickly.

Weekend: Reunion, volunteering & running

This weekend will be busy because it is family reunion weekend for my mom’s side of the family. We kick things off tonight with a 2-hour get together at a park. Say hi, hang out and keep it simple. Tomorrow,  my goal is to get my 7 mile run in right away in the morning. As in a 6:00am start. Otherwise, I doubt I will get it in.

From 9:00-11:00am, Carlos and I are going to a non-profit organization called Feed My Starving Children to volunteer with some of his work colleagues. And, if that weren’t a full day already, as soon as we finish there, we run home, grab Iggy and head to the park again to meet for the rest of the family reunion. My amazing cousin, Kirsten has a day full of festivities.

Sunday = no plans. Well, kind of. I have my 7am bootcamp that I’m going to try to make it too. But other than that, no plans…and I’m leaving it that way!

Be still my heart!

Ya’ll remember that recipe I shared w/ you a couple weeks ago for the buffalo chicken?  (Can of chicken +2 Laughing Cow Cheese Wedges + Franks Red Hot Sauce = DELISH!)

I have to share on an amazing improvement:

Laughing Cow Blue Cheese Wedges!

For all the stars in the sky and all the fish in the sea, and for all the Laughing Cow Light Blue Cheese, Dear Lordy thank you! Lemme just say, I missed all this up together and it was divine! I ate it w/ crackers but am convinced that even if you handed me celery, I’d still devour it! YUM!

Before I go, my older sister, Melinda started school this week. WAHOO for working moms in school! One of her classes is statistics (ugh!) and she needs to do the simplest survey ever – a 4 question survey. Would you have time?

Click here to take survey

And…on that note, I need to wrap this up and get some things done today. I hope ya’ll have an amazing day and a beautiful, healthy weekend!

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Dear Body,

I’ve never taken the time to truly reflect on how amazing you are. Instead, I’ve abused you beyond words. I’ve contaminated your very existence with toxins, mutilating the very definition of your reality. Years upon years of mistreatment and neglect. Ignoring signs you blared. I exploited you in any way possibly – physically, verbally and emotionally. Days turned into months turned into years.

Diet after diet. Restricting food one day, over feeding you the next. Extremely limited physical activity. Denying you the basic rights of a physical entity. And if that wasn’t enough, there was the hate-talk. The constant negative reminders about how disappointed I was. Blaming you for things you had no control over. Directing all responsibility on you, as if you were at fault for my disappointment. Never realizing you were only trying to survive with what you were given.

(Source)

As I sit here reflecting on how truly amazing you are, I cannot help but find my jaw hanging down. Despite everything, you believed in me and patiently waited. Although the abuse showed, you never stopped working.

Dear body, I’m learning. I’m realizing now, how amazing you are. I’m recognizing that if given a chance, you can overcome amazing accomplishments. I’m discovering, albeit slowly, how to trust you. How to listen for your signals. And how to be just as patient with you as you were and continue to be with me. I’m discovering how far you can take me and how, when we work together, how beautifully synchronized we can be.

I would be a fool if I said I would never again abuse you – but I stand here today to say that I apprecaite you. I cannot promise you perfection but my pledge to you is to recognize and be forever grateful for how far you’ve allowed me to come.

Dear Body, I apprecaite you.

(source)

Note to readers: this post was inspired by the personal & vulnerable letters found at Letters to my Body. I encourage you to, at some point today, stop and reflect on how amazing you are. Mind, body and spirit. Your letter can be shared publicly, as I’ve done as well as anonymously via email submission or even more anonymously via regular mail sent to a P.O. box. While I’ve shared my letter here with you, I’ve also submitted it to Letters to my Body

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Funny thing…when I started losing weight & fighting for my healthiness journey, I remember telling myself once I got “there” that it would be so much easier.

Funny thing…when I started losing weight & fighting for my healthiness journey, I remember feeling so frustrated that everyone else made it look so easy.

Funny thing…when I started losing weight & fighting for my healthiness journey, I remember wondering why it wasn’t working.

I experienced frequent self-doubt. Despite my own questions, I kept going. On the days I woke up with no motivation, I cried. Loud. And then, I washed my face and went to the gym. I never stopped.  And now, looking back at the past three years, I am befuddled.  Right next to the self-doubt I experienced, sat a source of belief. I believed in myself. I knew I could do it. I knew that, even on days when I didn’t feel like it, I had to keep going. Just keep living life. I knew that if I just kept trying, kept doing what I needed to do, that things would work out.

Self-doubt is a funny thing – in a sad way. My friend over at MizfitOnline wrote a post over a year ago about being our own superhero.

Stop and think about what she writes for a minute:

“Even on my worst days I believe I am my own superhero if only by virtue of the fact that I find it within myself to keep on keepin’ on.

And on my best day? I KNOW Im my own damn superhero because I know I can move mountains.

I know there’s nothing I cant do if I try (you know, due to my superhero status) and Im not afraid to try.

And you?”

I am confident enough to stand here and tell you that, your opinion of me makes no difference to me. I believed in myself. Three years later, I finally realize….

I am my own super hero!

The most amazing feeling in the world is to look back at hard work and see the results. (although it takes the mind an amazing amount of time to actually see those results, that is for another post.) Please please…read MizFit’s post on being your own superhero and then, take a deep breath and put on your cape. You are the only one who can do this.

I believe in you.

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